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The
act of procreation is part of every living
being. The act of procreation in human society
to other. The Bodo Society has its own established
tradition and custom to solemnise the marriage.
Before getting into the crux of the matter,
I like to elaborate the following.
(a)
(b)
(C) |
The
Bodos have no caste hierarchy system.
The question of Anuloma and Pratiloma
marriage is absent accordingly.
Inter-clan and intra-clan marriage are
not barred the Bodo Society. The inter-clan
marriage as it is observedin Bengali
marriage (Palti Ghar), Inra-Julu and
Intra-Sengfong of the Dimasa is not
maintained in the Bodo Society Instead,
the marriage between blood relatives
are strictly prohibited.
The Bodo society is a patrilineal society
with with residual traits of matrilineality.
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How
mates are chosen and marriage is solemnized
?
The Bodo society has four socially established
customs in respect of selection and marriage
of mates. They are as follows :-
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Arranged
Marriage.
Marriage by Elopement. (Kharsonani or
Dwnkharnai or Gandharva
marriage).
Bwnanwi Lainai or Asur Vivaha or Forced
Marriage.
Dongkha Hanai or Marriage of an unmarried
young man or an windower with an window.
Gwrjia janai or Ghar Jamai (Bengali)
or Ghor Jowai (Assamese).
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Arranged
Marriage
This
is the most accepted and practiced sytem
of Bodo marriage. The guardian of the marriageable
young man choose the bride with due consent
of bridegroom. There is one Bodo proverb
to that effect. The proverb is "Jerao
thuri nuyw beonw bhati garw, jerao jwn nuyw
beonw goy khithou garw". (Where we
see thatch, we drop bathi and where there
is maiden we drop goy khithou). Here Bhati
means a bamboo used for carrying bundles
of rice, gunny bags and goy khithou denotes
cut pieces of the ending portion of the
betel nut fruit. The guardian of the family
or his represntatie proposes the marriage
of the girl with their eligible bridegroom
with due humility. The social custom or
requirement on such occasion is two matured
bottles of rice beer to be brought by the
guardian of the bridegroom. The proposal
is put forward by the respresentatives stating
that the father of the bridegroom has chosen
the bride. If girl's father agrees, then
bridegroom will come over to bride's house
for formal introduction between the bride
and bridegroom. The interaction between
the boys and girls are accepted norm of
the society. Proposal of marriage is considered
after obtaining verbal consent from both
the girl and boy. Once the proposal is accepted
by bride's side, the arrangement of marriage
ceremony is made in the house of bridegroom.
In Bodo society the marriage is purely an
affair to be managed by the bridegroom's
family. On confirmation of engagement, the
date for solemnizing is fixed convenient
to both of the families. Before the Aryanisation
of Bodo society, the marriage was solemnized
according to convenience of the families
involved in the marriage. In modern days,
the date of marriage is fixed consulting
the Hindu Panjikas where the auspicious
moments are studied and dates are fixed.
After fixed the date of themarriage, the
bridegroom's family makes an elaborate arrangement
of marriage ceremony. The rice beer is brewed
in terms of Dabhas (big earthen jar) to
suffice to receive the bride's party. The
bride is accompanied by an entourage of
young boys, girls, guardian, Bwirathis,
band party and guardian of girl. The guardian
of the girl shall be preferably her father,
her father's brother or her maternal uncle.
It is preferred that the mother of the bride
shall not accompany the party. On the day
fixed for solemnizing the marriage, the
bridegroom's villagers come to the village
of bride alongwith Bwirathis for ceremonial
march of the bride to the bride's house.
They are received formally. Certain social
obligations and religious formalities are
observed. She takes leave of the members
of the family, relatives, her friends and
village elders who are not accompanying
the bride's to the village of the bridegroom.
After leaving father's home, the bride's
party marches to the village of bridegroom.
Once bride's party reaches the home of the
bridegroom, the villagers receive the bride's
party with much merriment and dances to
tune of bandparty. There are marriage tunes
relevant to the occasion. The barlangfas
and Bwirathis dance to receive bride. They
take a big piece of earth (hathor) on their
back during the dance. In Bodo, Ha means
earth and Ba means carry of bear. Before
entry into the courtyard (Sithla) of the
bridegroom's house, feet of the bride is
washed. The washing of feet is done by the
mother-in-law or any elder women relative
of the bridegroom. It is interpreted that
the Laxmi (Mainao) has come to her home.
The bride or Mainao is received with due
honour and sincerity in her new abode. The
bride is treated as Mainao of the house
who will look after the well-being of the
family after her marriage. It has religious
and social meaning. The bride is then brought
to the outhouse of the family till the marriage
is solemnized. In the original Bodo society
the Hathashuni from marriage is widely accepted.
On arrival of the bride and her entry to
the house, a pair of cock and hen is brought
before the Bathou alter in the north-eastern
corner of the courtyard of the house. The
Oja or the priest chants Mantra. A pair
of cock and hen is sacrificed at the altar
of the God and left to die and become still.
After the sacrifice, the villagers see the
heads, the body of cock and hen. It is minutely
studied. If is minutely studied. If the
direction of both the sacrifices are in
the same direction then it is believed that
the couple will be good pair and marriage
will last for long period. If the direction
of sacrifices does not remain in the same
direction or remain in the opposite direction,
then it is believed that either the marriage
will not last or there will be not peace
from the marriage. After the sacrifice,
the meat is cooked with powdered rice. The
special curry of the powdered rice is cooked
without any spice and condiments (ondla
bugob). The curry and other related edibles
are cooked by the villagers. Once the cooking
is over, the Oja or the priest chant the
Mantra of marriage. The bride is direction
to pray before the Ishing or Inner Prayer
house in main house or Noma-No of the family
to whom the bride is married off. The bride
and bridegroom are brought near the alter
of Batou.
The Oja starts chanting of Mantra at the
alter of Bathou in presence of villagers,
bride and bridegroom. After offering the
prayer the bridegroom is told sit near the
Bathou on a Khamflai or flat wooden stool.
The bride, then serve cooked rice and the
Ondla Bugob. The bridegroom is serve with
few handful of cooked rice and Ondla curry.
The bridegroom is supposed to gulp down
two or three mouthful of rice and leave
the place. There is belief in the community
that if the bridegroom take bellyful of
food, the marriage itself is thought to
be started with bad omen. The bridegroom
is believed or deemed to the selfish one
who is going to consume the whole benefit
of the bond of marriage. The meaning of
'Haba' or marriage denotes that both the
bridegroom and bride has taken the burden
of the earth on their shoulder. The word
"Ha" means "Earth" or
"Mother Earth" and "Ba"
means shouldering "The Burden of Mother
Earth". Therefore, the marriage is
not only a bond of young and marriageable
boy and girl but an acceptance of responsibility
for times to come. There is Boro saying,
"Bima bifajwng gonga, gandwi gondajwmg
gongnanggwn" (A young who does not
obey social rule can be bound by the marriage).
The interpretation of phrase is that a man
who does not obey the rule of the society
in his youth can be subdued by the bounded
duty of the marriage. The duty and responsibility
that brings by the marriage is so heavy
that an irresponsible man can also be brought
under control of the society through marriage.
After completion of the marriage the girl
is brought to the "Noma-No" or
the main house of the family. In Bodo custom,
the "Noma-No" has important significance.
No women except the wife, mother, grand-mother,
unmarried daughters, unmarried sisters of
the head of the family are allowed to enter
to the house. A married daughter or married
sister of the family are deemed to be Mainao
of the other family and hence deemed to
be "Malai" or "Other Member"
in her original house. It is believed that
after acceptance of a women as Mainao in
her husband's house, she is not supposed
to be Mainao in her father's orbrother's
house.
Once the ceremony is over, the bride is
bright into the Noma-No. The villagers coming
with bride are allowed to sit in the centre
courtyard of the family. They are allowed
to have rest. They are also offered tea,
betel-nut and other light food whichever
is arranged in the family.
There will be respite for all after the
ceremony. The newly married pair is brought
back to the courtyard to pay respect to
the elders from both villages. The bridegroom
and the bride offer their respect to all
the villagers. They may be either from the
bride's village of from the bridegroom's
village. The offer of respect is by bowing
before the elders and touching their feet
as a mark of respect. In turn, the young
ones are supposed to bow and touch feet
of bride and bridegroom.
Thencome the "Nirikh Bosonai: or severance
of relation. In this ceremony, the relation
of the bride with her blood relatives are
deemped to be severed once the ceremony
is over. In this occasion, the father, uncle,
paternal uncle or any other person from
her father or mother's side represent as
the guardian of the bride. The Nirikh Bosonai
has a great significance in the social system
of Bodos. After the Nirikh Bosonai, the
bride is no more related to her father's
house. Now, she belongs to her husband's
house. In earlier days, a girl or bride
married off is not even allowed to enter
to Noma-No or main house where the guardian
of the family sleeps or where the family
deity is place (Ishing place in Noma-No)
the Nirikh Bosonai or severance of relation
after marriage has more significance in
the Bodo society. If such formality is not
observed by the father of bridegroom during
the marriage, the daughters born out of
that wedlock shall be married off by the
maternal uncles from side of the mother.
The right off such daughter is automatically
transferred to the maternal uncle of the
daughter. This kind if arrangement is called
Mamai-mara Janai or marriage offered by
the maternal uncle. The Nirikh Bosonai is
the last social formality observed by the
society in case of marriage. Once the Nirikh
Bosonai is over, the father, uncle or any
one of the guardian of the family explain
both bride and bridegroom relating to the
responsibility of the couple has to undertake
in real and married life. It is also said
that the responsibility of wellbeing of
the bride is automatically on the bridegroom
does have to shoulder the responsibility
of looking after the bride and offspring
coming out of the wedlock. On the other
hand, bride has also responsibility to her
husband in the married life. The Bodo saying
is that the bridegroom is given with a stick
and a rope to control his wife (Laothi gongse
arw fage dwngse hwkhabai, bengnanwi jadw).
The saying is too hard and tough on the
bride and on women. After the Nirikh Bosonai,
the persons accompanying the bride leaves
the home of bridegroom. Thus ends the marriage
of Bodos.next day, grand drinking and eating
is arranged in the home of bridegroom. The
marriage is consummated on the following
night of the marriage.
There more formalities to be followed by
the new couple. The proceeding of the couple
on the eight day of marriage (Athimangala
or Athmangla) seems to be a tradion brought
by the Brahma relegion. The name itself
donates its origin. In the Athimangla, the
bride take leaves of her friends offering
a cup of tea and such other light foods.
It is called Bisina Chara. It is part of
Athimangala. No more formalities or obligation
remain after the Athimangala.
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